Guitar Wedding Cake

This is what compromise you get when you try to explain to your girlfriend of 5 years that you're "married to your music".

See Cake Wrecks for more tragic professional cakes.

R.S.V.P. - Regrets Only.

Where There's Smoke, There's Fire

Well, usually that's true. But in this case, there's no fire, just a bunch of bored Indians in Teva sandals.

I'm Sorry I Missed Your 118th Birthday Party

Gramma's gonna teach you about the importance of a prompt R.S.V.P.


I

Plan B

Last Monday, the mom and pop drugstore in my neighborhood had a sign up that read, "We are sold out of Plan-B" (Plan-B is the brand name of the morning-after pill). I'm not even joking. I can only imagine this meant a LOT of people had a real wild weekend.

While a buying out a store's supply of Plan-B is a pretty great badge of honor in terms of hard partying; when it's literally a banner you're wearing, it's kind of a dis, right?

M.I.L.F.s & D.I.L.F.s

Don't good looking old people freak you out? I mean, were they just good looking young people? Or did they grow into it by suffering through years of healthy living as a youth, like the fable of the grasshopper who carelessly plays fiddle all summer versus the ant who prepares for winter? Or do they have some portrait of themselves stashed away in their attic that looks like Nick Nolte's mugshot?

High School Is a Party You Can Never Miss

When you're in high school, it's this place where you just hang out with your buddies all day, so it's basically a huge party all day long, even when you're just chilling at your locker.