Hairy Body Shot

Ew.

Jungle Juice

I love mystery punch as much as anyone, but would it kill you to make the presentation a little more appealing?

Actually, nevermind. I'll pretty much drink anything with Minute Maid lemonade out of a Rubbermaid storage bin.

Happy Cinco de Mayo!

You only need one of the following items to have a great time: Pinatas, sombreros, and novelty-sized frozen drinks. But all 3 on one day? Only the Mexicans could have dreamed of a combination so sweet.







Put all 3 together, and you have this guy. Just livin' the dream:

Second Amendment or not...

You know, it works out pretty well that Ted Nugent is a strict nondrinker. Please, please, please be more like the Nuge, and don't mix Sparks and firearms.

Sorry I Missed Your Toga Party...

....It looked like an excellent way for me to really just go ahead and test some boundaries in a safe environment.

Ok, I admit it. I couldn't find any clean white sheets without stains, so I was too embarrassed to show up.

Get me out of this party!

Noooooooooooooooooo!

When is it time to hang up the beer bong?

I really shouldn't be making judgments about people in their late 20s and 30s who are still out there partying like youngsters, trying to make up for the lost years spent in a college that didn't have fraternities. Because if that's a crime, then lock me up and throw away the key to adjusted maturity.

But then again, there's something that does just kind of look ridiculous when you have greying hair and you're holding a beer bong.

On the other hand, I don't really have a problem with this: